Sermon for Sunday, September 13, 2026 at Unionville Presbyterian Church (BPC)
Old Testament Text:
[Genesis 2:18-25 ESV] 18 Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” 19 Now out of the ground the LORD God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. 20 The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. 21 So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.
New Testament Text:
[1 Corinthians 7:10-16 ESV] 10 To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband 11 (but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife. 12 To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. 13 If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. 15 But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. 16 For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
Gospel Text and SermonText: [Matthew 19:1-12 ESV] 1 Now when Jesus had finished these sayings, he went away from Galilee and entered the region of Judea beyond the Jordan. 2 And large crowds followed him, and he healed them there. 3 And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?” 4 He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” 7 They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?” 8 He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.” 10 The disciples said to him, “If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.” 11 But he said to them, “Not everyone can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given. 12 For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.”
It strikes me that each of these chapters, each of these passages of Matthew’s Gospel, are “big.” There is much that depends on them, and many theological discussions through the ages have relied on them. And far better to rely on the Scriptures than to ignore them!
So we continue on from the previous chapters on the subject of forgiveness and now come to the subject of divorce. I don’t believe there is a specified logical flow here. Instead, this subject (of divorce) comes up because the Pharisees are again testing Jesus with a difficult question.
And that should be a reminder to us that this IS A DIFFICULT QUESTION! We don’t necessarily know all the answers, BUT we do have the Word of God which gives us a clear answer here.
What we find here is “the unlawfulness of divorce.” And in case anyone here is listening who has had a divorce, I ask you “be patient and listen to the teachings of the Word of God; don’t tune out because of your past, but learn from this.” There is much to learn, for the subject is more complex than “divorce is sin.” Indeed, we even see a caveat in the text. Divorce is not sinful in a certain circumstance.
But, GENERALLY SPEAKING, as Jesus first states, Divorce is Unlawful. I would add “Divorce is Awful.” You’ve probably seen those public signs “Littering is unlAWFUL” where the word AWFUL inside of UNLAWFUL is capitalized. These make the point that both LEGALLY and MORALLY, something is wrong and ought to be avoided.
Occasionally you’ll find a group like the Roman Catholic Church or the Protestant Reformed Church that has particularly strict views on divorce. (Or at least used to in the case of Rome; I’m not sure how strict they are today). More often you’ll find loose views on divorce. That is probably what Jesus was dealing with in his time; there were some who allowed divorce for any reason. And isn’t that what we have in our nation today – no fault divorce. A marriage legally can be ended for any reason, or no reason. Marriage is hardly a BOND at all; it is just a temporary contract.
It is THAT VIEW which Jesus is most clearly against in our passage. And it is a case of history repeating itself, or “what comes around goes around,” for here we are just like in Christ’s time where there is simple divorce.
And in such a situation there is no stability for people; there is nothing legally slowing down the process.
Now, that might be so, but we also have THE CHURCH. And, we hope, at least the church can stop marriages from dissolving, we hope the church can be a positive force for the good of marriages. And so we ought to learn from Jesus; marriage is FOR LIFE. That is the plan of God. And the only exceptions to that are in rather extreme cases.
So let’s look at Jesus’s teaching on divorce.
I. The Law of God on Divorce
These Pharisees are like annoying little gnats, continuing to follow Jesus wherever he goes and peppering with difficult questions, hoping to trip him up and show that he is not a prophet.
They’ve asked before:
– Why does Jesus eat with tax collectors and sinners?
– Is it lawful to heal on the Sabbath?
– Why do your disciples break the tradition of the elders and not wash their hands when they eat?
Now they ask about divorce.
“Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause.”
And before Jesus gets to the EXCEPTIONS, he starts with the LAW.
Here we see the lofty position Jesus gives the Old Testament. “Have you not read.” It is the very Word of God. It is the AUTHORITY! He doesn’t say “Have you talked to the Chief Priest, the Pope of the Day.” He says “SOLA SCRIPTURA” – the word alone is their authority. And in that Word is the Law. Here Jesus references the book of Genesis.
“He who created them from the beginning made them male and female.” (Genesis 1:27, 2:23, etc)
and he quotes Genesis 2:24:
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”
That is the command of God!
So, Jesus now concludes from that, that the married couple is to stay together.
He says “What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
This is the plan of God. Marriage is for the GOOD of mankind.
Our Confession says that “Marriage was ordained for the mutual help of husband and wife, for the increase of mankind with legitimate issue, and of the church with an holy seed, and for preventing of uncleanness.”
Each of those is true. And, as such marriage is of GREAT VALUE.
a. for the mutual help of husband and wife.
I first think that marriage is a help against loneliness. That is indeed true. And it is a help against financial struggles, and a help against being overwhelmed by the tasks necessary to live in this world; by dividing up tasks between man and wife, each is benefitted.
b. for the increase of mankind with legitimate issue.
This isn’t to say that “illegitimate” children are any less valuable in the eyes of God, but merely to say that in marriage, a child is blessed with a stable family; with a father and a mother. And you hardly need a study to tell you that that is the ideal circumstance; that a child ought to have both a father and a mother active in their lives.
c. of the church with an holy seed
Indeed that is the case. We ought to evangelize no doubt, and encourage others to join the church. But having children born from among and within the church is a great blessing for them and for the church.
d. for preventing uncleanness
This is true both in the ceremonial uncleanness and of actual physical uncleanness. Many are there who wish they would have married younger and not gotten into as many problems as they had; physical as well as emotional, spiritual, moral, and the like.
So marriage is a great thing. And it was ordained of God.
THEREFORE, LET MAN NOT SEPARATE!
Troubles are to be worked out. Forgiveness (the subject of the last chapter) must ever be in mind, as two live as one.
II. The Exception God granted through Moses
But, now the Pharisees try to trick Jesus. What about Moses? “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away.” They are trying now to get Jesus to oppose Moses! If Jesus say that Moses in wrong, the Pharisees will have reason to give to all the people for them to rise up against Jesus!
In Deuteronomy 24:1 Moses allows for a man to divorce his wife if “he has found some indecency in her.”
Now this “some indecency” is “some uncleanness” in the King James Version, and in Hebrew means “nakedness.”
And the meaning of this word has been a great debate.
Naturally, one would think that this “uncleanness” or “nakedness” would be adultery. But some have argued that it can be ANYTHING that causes the husband to lose favor with her, such as spoiling a meal or simply finding someone else attractive.
But this view is ridiculous. It would be “no fault” divorce; or rather “any fault” divorce. And that just doesn’t fit with the rest of Scripture.
Indeed, one ought not to get a divorce for just ANY reason.
It is truly “till death do us part.” “for better or for worse, in sickness and in health.”
It is not right to “send them away” for just any trivial purpose.
So Jesus says:
8 “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.
So we have first the world as God created it to be. And all was good.
But then came sin. And so in these times God granted an exception.
The only exception allowed here in a clause in verse 9: “except for sexual immorality.” This is Jesus’s commentary on Moses; if there was any ambiguity in the word Moses used (which I don’t think there was), it is now clear what Jesus is saying. It is clear that adultery is here in view, because “adultery” is the judgment upon the one who divorce too hastily. And we have to remember that in those times, such a crime as adultery deserved death. So it is serious business.
But it is serious business also when adultery has occurred. In such a case, divorce is allowed.
Indeed, if the Jewish law was followed out, the adulterer would be killed, and the spouse free from that marriage. But if the punishment was not carried out – and perhaps it wasn’t under Roman rule or under the rule of Herod – then with adultery it was as if the guilty partner were dead. The innocent party is free of the marriage.
But there are some additional points to be made.
The “innocent party” – and I say this in quotes because no one is sinless, though they may be innocent of adultery, the innocent party IS NOT REQUIRED to get a divorce. Forgiveness is possible. Difficult, but possible.
And then there is a second exception granted in the scriptures. That is the case of abandonment.
[1 Corinthians 7:15 ESV] 15 But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.
The confession also notes that truth:
WCF 24:6
“… nothing but adultery, or such willful desertion as can no way be remedied by the church, or civil magistrate, is cause sufficient of dissolving the bond of marriage.”
We also see a point about “remarriage” in this chapter. Now, some theologians are entirely opposed to remarriage. But we must grant that it is possible under certain circumstances. One may get married again if their spouse dies. And, with the exception in verse 9, it is clear that the “innocent party” does not commit adultery if he remarries.
III. To Marry or Not to Marry, that is the Question.
In ANY OTHER CASE, Jesus says “whoever divorces his wife and marries another, commits adultery.” Again, deserving death!
That explains why the disciples then say, “If such is the case of a man and his wife, it is better not to marry!”
Better not to risk death!
Is that the right conclusion?
To marry or not to marry, that is the question!
Which is better?
I think that’s the wrong question.
We must recognize that we are blessed by God whether in marriage or in singleness.
[REPEAT: we are blessed by God whether in marriage or singleness.]
11 But he said to them, “Not everyone can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given. 12 For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.”
Do you know about the Shakers? There are Quakers and there are Shakers. And the Shakers didn’t get married. So, they don’t exist today. They had no children. If that were Christ’s teaching, then humankind would deplete itself; and if not humankind, at least the church; it would be gone.
And we have to reject the monk-ish idea also that single “holy men” are more holy than those who marry.
Marriage is ordained of God.
But we must avoid the other error as well; to think that marriage is the only way and that singleness is a defect.
The Scriptural teaching is that each are good in their own ways; each blessed of God, and useful toward kingdom purposes.
If you are married, praise the Lord.
If you are single, praise the Lord.
Give glory to God in all circumstances.
Application: Let us encourage the permanence of marriages.
Recognize those benefits as we noted before.
Cleanliness, the blessing of children, and the mutual help of husband and wife.
And ultimately, not splitting apart what God has brought together, but striving for permanence. You really have to start with that view “this is for life.” You can’t go half-heartedly into marriage.
Application: There is forgiveness of sins even for divorce.
But what is the message for those who are divorced? It might not be here in this text. Well, you might see the message that divorce is sin; and you’d be right. But elsewhere, when we look at the whole scriptures, we find that such is not the unforgivable sin. No doubt “God hates divorce” (Malachi 2:16), but there is forgiveness even in that.
So don’t let modern pharisees trip you up.
Many question will come your way. Doubts, and challenges to the Word of God.
But it is to the Word of God that we go for answers.
And we have to take it in its entirety.
– Marriage was designed of God
– God hates divorce and it came about only as a way to handle the situation in extreme sins of adultery and abandonment.
– Be strong in the Lord, whatever your circumstances. Married, single, or divorced. In each situation look to the Lord for the forgiveness of sins and give him the Glory, for great things he has done.
Let us pray.